Everyone has a dream or dreams, goals they wish to accomplish and visions they wish to see come into Fruition, and oh how lovely and inspiring it is! I believe that the greatest tragedy and only failure in life is the very neglect and supression of these things. We all were put on the Earth to add our own unique touch to it, not to just live and survive, but to thrive and succeed. But what is it that causes the failure or neglect of our greatest ambitions, hopes, dreams and visions? It is the spirit of what we'll call today "dream stoppers".

With so many accomplishments,  big and small, I had begun to think about just where I've come from in my journey. Though I have quite a way to go, I have certainly come very far. Just like anyone else, I have met with so many challenges in my past. 

Thinking of things that I have previously encountered while on this journey really puts me into even deeper reflection. With deep reflection, I can recall that while in the midst of past encounters, I did not always have the confidence that things would be just fine, but of course, they were and I made it through. 

Upon such reflection, I would normally find myself thinking: "wow. I've been through so much". And though this is true, I find that such a thought brings me into a mindset that welcomes feelings of regret, remorse, and sometimes bitterness. Allow me to explain. When reflecting on the past and what has been endured, it is not very constructive to accompany those thoughts with regret, remorse, and bitterness, for it defeats the whole purpose of learning our lessons, and leaving all that we've encountered just where it is, in the past. This is a major reason why many of us experience a cycle of old feelings, pain, thoughts, and attitudes. We think of the past and all that we have previously endured as something we've been through, rather than overcame.

By identifying with our past encounters and struggles as something we've "been through", we play the victim, and therefore become helpless, hopeless, and less optimistic about facing the future. But, what if we instead played the conqueror? Just by changing the way we see and speak about our previous struggles, we can change our position from victim to conqueror. 

In present day, I try to never think about myself as having "been through" so much. I instead realize with full confidence that I've overcome so much.When we think of ourselves as having been through so much, we grow tired, feel cheated, used, abused, and unlucky. On the other hand, when we realize how much we've overcome, we can truly begin to reflect on our strength, our favor, how much we've learned, and how far we've come. Instead of focusing on our victimization, we must focus on our victories, and resurface our true strength into our awareness. 

Change the way you look at your journey. Everything was brought to each of us for reasons that coincide with our journey, and we would have never been brought to it if we could not see our way through it and become better after experiencing it. Be a conqueror.



By: Saudia M.

The above statement was just a thought that I've held practically all day and decided to share today in "Bedtime Briefings" and on many of my social networking sites. It is, of course, a reflective thought stemming from experience, this experience being ongoing behavior that I frequently witness. Many people today want so badly to prove their "confidence" that they see it necessary to attempt to diminish someone else's in order to see their own as greater. This is what I have deemed to be "false confidence". False confidence is a portrayal of self love and esteem that can only exist when it destroys or defaces any real confidence in its presence that may seem threatening. The thing about real, true confidence is that it is gained when a person sees their worth and greatness despite anything outside of themselves. There are no determining factors in real confidence that deals with another person's confidence, comparison of another individual, or prevalence over another individual. Confidence, in its authenticity, exists when found through self observation, appreciation, and remembrance of greatness.

This "digital age" definitely has its perks. 40 years ago, there was no way to instantly communicate with others far away, chat live via screen with friends, place all of your questions in a digital search box, or communicate your thoughts via a blog. The digital/social media and networking era is extremely helpful in speeding up the process of communication, sharing thoughts creatively, and discovering the depths of nearly anything through research. We can count on past generations to remind us of how "good" we've got it when it comes to social media as compared to "back in their day".What does the overload of social media do to us as a society? Quite certainly, too much of anything is never a good thing. I've become content with catching up with friends new and old via Facebook, and was a bit of a straggler when it came to Twitter and Instagram, yet nevertheless, they are now full-blown in my social media sector. Just when I think these three particular sites have set the bar when it comes to sharing and communicating, others always seem to surface. At this point, I begin to wonder: "what is the point?".

Certainly, these sites are spectacular concepts for profit for their creators, and it is nice for users to be able to have variety for their social media outlets. However, is it possible that we can become lost, covered, and compressed in social media as we try to keep up with these trends? Of course. How on Earth do we manage to keep up with it all, and more interestingly, why do we view it to be so necessary? I've noticed that many of social media's faithful users rely on such for communication, expression, and connection, with limited dependency on other non-social media outlets for communication, expression, and connection. It's safe to say that many people who have become obsessed with social media sites and outlets have allowed it to dwindle old fashion conversation and communication, and confrontation. It is too often that I am invited to partake in New forms of social media just to communicate, or to be almost forced to hold a conversation through social media, or to be subject to outsiders believing that my full personality & details of my life can be discovered through my social media profiles.

There is definitely Too much damn social media! Well, not really, but there is too much dependency on social media when it comes to communication. Full blown communication is not solely accessible through social media. There is an intimacy lost and a connection which can be misconstrued when communication is left at the hands of social media. Seeing such a dependency on and obsession with social media, it will be quite interesting to see the state of human emotion, expression, and communication in the far future. Nevertheless, I will hope for the best.

My challenge to you? Become more aware. Intentionally work on communicating better with people who are in your physical reality. Unplug from other people's lives, opinions, and agendas that are spread across social media. You can, and you'll be happy you did!


By: Saudia M.

We are often taught to be "selfless", and of course because this is a popular belief system, we are afraid to challenge this concept and it becomes taboo to even question. However, could it be that the concept of "selflessness" has been misinterpreted? Could it be that the misinterpretation of selflessness indeed causes the destructive behaviors of  self-criticism, self-hatred, self-neglect, and self-worth that we often fall victim to? If you ask the average person who strictly believes in selflessness as a way of life what it truly means, they will more than likely interpret it to be a "give, give, give and never receive" characteristic. However, what truly is selflessness? Despite the various popular misconceptions of selflessness which causes people to act as pushovers and act in self-neglect, true selflessness deals with sincerity, genuine action, and acting in love freely out of desire and morale without expectation of recognition. 

Many also view a "selfish" person as someone who "takes, takes, takes and never gives". However, what truly is selfishness? Selfishness is a form of love. Yes, love. Selfishness, is not taking and never giving, nor is it taking advantage of others as many may think. Selfishness, a parallel of selflessness, deals with spending time with yourself, loving yourself, giving to yourself, and taking care of yourself. When this form of love and compassion is shown to self, an appreciation is formed. Once an appreciation is formed, it is then that it becomes easier and more enjoyable to give this form a love and compassion to others in an act of selflessness. 

A balance is needed in true selflessness and selfishness. When the two are equally embraced, one is able to teach others how they are to be treated, to delve into relaxation, to love themselves in a deeper way, to give freely without any other motive than to genuinely be of service to someone in need with love, care, and compassion. We tend to feel the need to embrace either what is "good", or what is "bad", as if to choose sides, when truly "good", and "bad" are actually misconceptions that give way to imbalance within, thus the imbalance of love for self and for others. There is a saying that states, "who can you help if you can't help yourself?" This quote speaks volumes, therefore, do not be afraid of true selfishness. You should try it sometimes!


By: Saudia M.